13 December 1916

Since I became chaplain I’ve grown very lazy and on mortified, the cause of much unhappiness and remorse to me. My excuse is that my present life is so hard and repugnant that I need these little indulgences. Then I think of Blessed Charles Spinola, for example, amid the horrors of his prison, practicing great austerities, fasting, etc which make me ashamed of my cowardice. The Holy Spirit is constantly urging me not to let this precious time slip by, when even a small sacrifice is worth many a big one at other times. I see the only chance is to mark down the special acts I do, for though I hate doing so, I know it is an immense help, and otherwise nothing is done. I’ve begun the “Book of Little Sacrifices” again today.

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